Aside

i hope i don’t beat this spirit out of her

[Annie, 45 minutes after bedtime. Her 3rd appearance at her door, and perhaps the 10th time we’ve intervened since 7:30.]

Annie: Mom, can I have one more question?

Me: Annie, I’m really disappointed to see you out of bed. This is the time to be resting our bodies.

Annie: But Mom, I needed to tell you that Paul shared some of his lovies with me.

Me: Okay, but I don’t understand why you needed to get out of bed and tell me that, or—Paul shouldn’t be—he shouldn’t be out of bed either, even sharing lovies.

Annie: But Mom, I just wanted to tell you about kindness.

[Beat]

Me, with a softer tone: Oh gosh, Annie. I do, I do like hearing about kindness. But—

Annie: And it’s a dog family. Okay, goodnight.

Me: Goodnight.

Annie: Mom, do you know who I love the most?

Me: Who?

Annie: My whole family.

Me: That’s LOVELY, Annie. Goodnight.

Annie: Goodnight!

[10 minutes later, still listening to them chatter]

future horror director hones her craft

Annie’s story requests continue to develop:

“Tell me a story about when Elsa was driving with her dad, and he turned off his headlights, and all the other cars did too, and then they all had a big crash, and then the wolves and the coyotes and the werewolves and the hyenas came–”

“And the lions!” (Paul)

“And the lions came, and they couldn’t call anyone because they didn’t have their phones.”

So I told it to them, naturally. Spoiler alert: Elsa makes a big ice bubble to keep the scary animals away, and they wait it out until a police helicopter spots them in the morning. Phew.